Dinner Time
by twinchopsticks
Summary: It was exactly like trying to feed a child. It was ridiculous and completely unnecessary. Yet here he was, trying to shove the food down his throat. Oneshot at failed humor. DenxNor, a little head cannon of mine. T for language. Enjoy.


They'd sat at the table for about thirty minutes now. The food was almost all gone, and all the unfinished, small clumps of food were beginning to harden onto the glass plates. The milk in their glasses was beginning to seal itself onto the sides, while the leftovers were becoming stale in their uncovered dishes.

However, the two sat, stubborn as statues. No one and nothing was going to move them.

"Norway...you have to eat them."

"Hell. No."

The Norwegian turned slightly, his arms crossed and his nose pointed up in the air in resentment.

"I won't let you leave this table until you eat them."

Norway looked like he had no intention of getting up. He sat like a rotting log.

"Fine then. I won't move."

Denmark exasperated a sigh, wiping his hands across his face. He groaned.

"Come on, Nor! Don't act like a little kid! You have to eat your broccoli! Look there's only _three_ measly pieces! And they're even drenched in cheese. The only reason you have to is because the doctor said you need more iron! And broccoli is stuffed with iron."

Norway whipped his head around to glare at Denmark straight in the eyes. He looked exactly like a defiant five year old. He scooted closer and began poking at Denmark's broad chest. His cheeks flared and puffed out as his eyebrows furrowed into a crease.

"_Danmark._ I refuse to eat those putrid pieces of things you call food, and I refuse to be treated like a child! I will _not_ eat the broccoli and there is _nothing_ you can do to convince me otherwise!" he cried out, slamming his finger over and over into Denmark's chest.

Now mind you, just because Denmark lets Norway walk all over him ninety percent of the time, doesn't mean he's not just as stubborn. Denmark is just as if _not more_ stubborn than Norway is. Just as Norway's finger slammed into his chest a few billion times, Denmark yanked at his wrist and frowned disapprovingly.

"I will hand feed you if you don't eat at least two of those pieces of broccoli. Okay? We can compromise."

Denmark scooped up a piece of broccoli in a spoon and held it in front of Norway's face.

Norway considered this for a moment, after an expression of pure disgust had washed over his face. (He will not be hand fed. That is a definite no, no.)

"One piece. I will consume one. Single. Piece."

Denmark immediately shook his head.

"No can do. Two."

"One and a half."

Denmark squinted his eyes. Oh he's gonna play like that is he? Well then...two can play at that game.

"Fine. But you have to let me hand feed you."

At this point, all the color left in the Norwegian's face was completely washed away. His mouth dropped and his eyes grew wide.

"_ABSOLUTELY NOT! What part of I will not be treated like a child do you not understand, you annoying, spiky-haired Dane!_" he erupted, "That is _no way_ to settle any deal!"

Denmark smirked and leaned back, the spoonful of broccoli still in his hand, "Fine. Then I will go and hide your little pink rabbit."

A flicker of alarm flashed in Norway's eyes. He stared, lips pursed and color gone. No. Denmark wouldn't go for such a low blow would he? No! Absolutely not! He wouldn't...he wouldn't...!

"N-Not Mr. Kanin! You wouldn't dare!" Norway sputtered helplessly.

Denmark's smirk stretched into a full on grin. He nodded slowly, "Oh I would...and I know a perfect place to hide him too. A place you wouldn't even think to look."

Norway stood and his foot slammed against the floor. His fists were balled up and his temper was rising.

"You may treat me like a child, you may blow small things out of proportions and you can try and force those despicable pieces of plant into my throat but you may _not_ bring in Mr. Kanin into this! You will _not _hide him and I refuse to let you lay a finger on him!" he exclaimed furiously, his arms shaking.

His eyes were sharp and cold as they glared daggers into Denmark's face. (most likely those daggers got caught in Denmark's physics-defying hair)

After a moment of heavy breathing, he fell back into the chair with his arms crossed once again. He bit his cheek before he slowly let his mouth open.

Welp, there goes the rest of Norway's pride.

At this action, Denmark beamed and planted the spoon into Norway's mouth. A sour face etched its way onto the Norwegian's features, but he chewed slowly, painfully. Then after the broccoli and cheese had turned into digestible mush, Norway swallowed. The slimy substance pushed down his throat.

You know how all this goes. Don't tell me you've never experienced this kind of thing before.

The process was then repeated with a thankfully smaller piece. When the pain was over, Norway chugged a glass of milk.

"You Danish bastard. I'll kill you for that!" he gasped as he wiped his face.

Denmark simply winked as he put the dishes in the sink, "That's what you said a hundred years ago. And look at where we are now."

Norway rolled his eyes and marched off to his room, making sure to double check Mr. Kanin's protective status.

In the end, the lesson learned was to start dinner an hour early, so there's room left to force feed your boyfriend nutritious foods.

* * *

**Well that was exciting. Don't ask me where this came from. I don't know. -w- just a silly little headcannon I guess. **

**It's been a while since I've written so enjoy! Boy I just can't write humor. :c i'm sorry**

**-TC**


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